 |
| Blenheim - I DID IT ! |
So for this chapter I was going to go into an in-depth analysis of each of my next 3 triathlons, which I did type out and have just deleted because I realised it was really really boring. People were beginning to glaze over at dinner parties when the dreaded "T" word was mentioned. So for those that are interested my times are below and for those who are really interested I'll show you my spreadsheet one day! ....And now my biggest challenge is to continue to make this blog entertaining......
THE NEXT CHAPTER IN MY LIFE - What Cathy did next.
Many things happened to me over the summer which some of you are aware of and boy some of my findings would make a fascinating blog - maybe another time, and under another name. Some of those women are parents at school. Soooo.......
CYCLING
 |
| Helmet since changed - See COG below |
I managed to pack some cycling in over the summer, had some great rides. Chain continued to fall off. Great if you can persuade someone else to put it back on. I have noticed a reticence amongst other race participants to stop and help with this during a race so have had to get my hands dirty on occasion. Turns out it was the hanger rail as suspected - now straightened so all now good. See I even know some technical equipment terms, before all this I thought a hanger rail was something you hung your latest collection on!
CHECK ME OUT - COGS, DCOG, HOGS and..
 |
| Mamil in all the right gear |
I've realised there is a certain code of conduct rather like the Mason's handshake amongst cyclists. This first became apparent from postings on Facebook where certain cycling individuals critiqued my bike and accessories. It was like Bike Nip they couldn't help themselves. Comments on reflectors, saddle dimensions, saddle bag size, drinks carrier, tyres, handlebar tape etc. And whilst out cycling other cyclists do the C.O.G the Cycling Aptitude Onceover Glance.(I know, I know I missed the A out). This is rather like the D.C.O.G Diamond Count Onceover Glance, which has happened to me at certain dinner parties with certain materialist individuals and people from Alderley Edge. You can see their eyes moving over you as they mentally scan the number, clarity and size of the diamonds you are wearing. Ears check, Necklace check, Engagement ring size check. Yuk.
 |
| Wine Bag - the perfect handbag ? |
Also similar to H.O.G - Handbag Onceover Glance which used to happen a lot at the marketing agency I used to work at. Walk into meeting - handbag on the table - bosh - Mulberry - oh yes check me out (not me I hasten to add). Oh Blow! - out trumped by a Chanel! We'll do the minutes then. I think men probably play this with watches. And that's where I think I should leave my acronyms! So.....
Check Me Out! I know I have a nice bike and I think this has lulled some people to falsely believe I know what I'm doing. On this basis I have been allowed on bike rides that quite frankly were way out of my league. Which becomes blatantly obvious quite quickly when they leave me for dust, cycling through treacle humming "Things Can Only Get Better" and sucking on a cherry drop.
TRICLUB INITIATION SUNDAY RIDE
 |
| And it rained and it rained and it rained |
This weekend I went for my first Sunday Club Ride with the Tri Club I had joined - about a year ago! The C.a.O.G was done at the beginning of the ride:- drop handlebars, no reflectors, no visor on my helmet, cleats, a Ridley bike, even some cycling lycra with the little lobster logo on. Check me out! so far, so good, I had passed the first test, maybe my glasses had let me down? I had also learned some hand signals at Tricamp so I kinda knew what I was doing, I could speak their coded-language too. My first initiation ride with the Tri Club was to be to the Surrey Hills in what can only be described as biblical rain. Rivers for roads, wasn't sure what the hand signal for otters swimming in the road because it's flooded was.
I could hear myself chattering away nervously dropping into conversation various cycling tit-bits to back up my cycling credentials, Sa Calobra bla bla, 100mile bike ride bla bla, triathlons bla bla, Mallorca bla bla. But this couldn't disguise the fact that they were just a hellava lot faster than me and I was holding them up. I have to confess though this did work to my advantage when I skidded and fell off. They were so far ahead of me no-one saw as my back wheel skidded underneath me while going down hill braking furiously to try and avoid ending up in the boot of a Ford Focus. I yelped like a girl (I am a girl) all the way, attached to my bike by my cleats, I landed wet and soggy in the road. Fuck! Quick! get up Catherine no-one saw - I giggled to myself! Got away with it. And at least I wasn't the guy who had 3 punctures! Still didn't get to the fabled Box Hill, so this is still on the bucket list, maybe on a sunny day?.
THE RIPPLE EFFECT
 |
| My Age Group Category - that's quite a ripple |
It seems that it has occurred to a few people that bloody hell if that Catherine Jevans can do a Triathlon - it can't be that difficult. I've had lots of my lovely friends saying the blog has inspired them to do more exercise and set themselves a challenge. So buoyed by this positive ripple effect I spied my next victim. I'd heard that a lady from school was interested in doing Triathlon's so I collared her and told her I had been a virgin Triathlete last year too. " Read my blog" I said "it's all about a numpty starting out." I saw her a couple of weeks later - ME: "Have you entered Blenheim yet?" HER: "I read your blog and I'm having second thoughts, it scared me" she avoids my gaze these days. Looks like my recruitment technique needs some fine tuning. Although Chris my boss who I lured into Triathlons is the other extreme. Not content with piddly little Sprints after 1 Triathlon - he's aiming for Olympic distances next year and has his full training and race schedule fully mapped out. On a spreadsheet no doubt! He may even have persuaded me to do 1 Olympic distance next year - Oh Shit! (1.5k swim, 40k bike and 10k run) That's going to hurt.
Other friends told me how they had been at a Spa and read an article about middle aged women doing Triathlons because of a mid-life crisis. "Oh how we laughed" she said "We thought of you!".She had actually hit the nail on the head. Mid-life crises aren't funny. But at least sport and excessive amounts of exercise are a positive outlet for it - and you can eat as many snacks as you like.
In fact I love my age-group category. Apart from when I'm standing on the side of a lake and they are squashed into their wet-suits beside me. Have you seen the size of some of their limbs? - you could have my front teeth out with that!
AM I SADIST?
In October I did the 100 mile Tour of the Forest in Loughborough with fellow cyclists Gareth, Gary and Nick, my new Strava friends. It was a cold morning, according to the Lycra cycling kit! The ride was a long old northern slog, but we all did it, some fuelled purely by Jaffa cakes.This was despite a few more hills than were forecast. But we all completed. And like the biblical bike ride in the rain I did really enjoy it. I got a kick out of the challenge. And boys I have to say until you've done Sa Calobra nothing feels like a hill in comparison. You need to get yourselves out to Mallorca!.
 |
| 100mile gang - Me, Gary, Nick and Gareth (Bethan on wall) |
MY TOP TIPS for TRIATHLON
1. Always have a tune to sing in your head when things are going wrong mine is "Things can only get better"
2. My in depth research of 4 Tri-athlons has concluded that Cherry Drops are my boiled sweet of choice.
3. Always remember where EXACTLY you've racked your bike - saves valuable time in transition.
4. Don't take other peoples cycling helmets home with you after an event - that's stealing.
5. Don't forget you've put your wet cycling shoes on the radiator at home and not actually left them at the event, thus wasting those poor people in the lost property department's time. Thank you Oliver at Hever Castle.
6. I could go into a whole lot of detail about periods, Trisuits and Triathlons but here is not the place. Actually some of the women in my age-group category don't have to worry about this anymore.
7. Don't eat gels they make you gag. Bloc sweets are good though.
8. Make sure your bike is in the right gear to suit the first part of the bike leg. And don't laugh at the people on mountain bikes as they struggle up the hill looking beetroot red. And definitely resist the temptation to say "you should get a road bike".
9. Try not to stare at the men peeling off their wetsuits as they come out of the lake dripping wet into transition. That might be another reason for middle aged women taking up Triathlons? Sod Robbie Williams, these boys have pecs.
10. Try not to think what might actually be lurking at the bottom of that muddy lake beside the old castle as you swim across it.
THE TRIATHLON THE TIMES - I did in deed knock time off my first ever Triathlon! Yeeessssssssa!
 |
| Still Smiling ! |
Triathlon 2 - Thames Turbo August 25th - Pissing rain.
TIME: 1:27.12. 7th in Age Group category.
Triathlon 3 - Woburn Abbey 7th September - Sunny
TIME: 1:27.31. 8th in Age Group category.45th overall - OMG that must be wrong!
Triathlon 4 - Hever Castle 27th September - Warm Very Very Hilly (did I mention it was hilly?)
TIME: 1:28.20. 22nd/200 in my age group. Oh yes I think I can actually do this tri thing.
Next Chapter.....Goals
Swim:-Better and don't retch
Bike:- Faster Longer Harder (oerrrr sounds a bit rude!)
Run:- Without injury and maybe with some new shoes and over 10k.
